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awakening big picture growth musings spirit success Wealth

What is the most destructive question that everyone asks themselves?

“What’s in it for me?”

This is the underlying question almost everyone has running in the back of their minds.  Someone makes you an offer and you automatically ask it.
“What’s in it for me?”
Parents ask a variation, “What’s in it for my child, my family?”

 

It’s perfectly normal and most everyone does it.

 

So why is it a problem?

Because this question reveals a mindset of lack.
“Gimme, gimme, gimme.”
“Take, take, take.”
It’s the voice of the ego based on fear, insecurity, and a lack of abundance.

 

It’s victim thinking, not a hero.

Poverty Thinking

I experienced this growing up.

 

It was like life was an all you can eat buffet.
But “You better get your money’s worth.”
It’s why cruise ship guests put on their “buffet pants.”
Or the advice of some who say, “don’t fill your plate with the cheap stuff, grab the good stuff.”

 

Now, what if we could shift this to the opposite?

What if we could change the question?
Not
“What’s in it for me?”
But rather

“How can I help?”

Abundance Thinking

By asking this new question, there is an assumption of abundance.  This question assumes you have the power, capacity, and ability to help.  It’s a powerful question. You are tapping into your true gifts. It comes from a deeply spiritual place, not your ego.  There is more than enough to share.

 

We’ve all had ups and downs in our lives.  I personally experienced many magical miracles. And then flipped to complete despair.

 

What I’ve noticed is the presence of the first question and not the latter.  Mindset is the key.

So what is mindset?

A mentor of mine recently gave me an amazingly simple definition:

 

“Mindset is the voice(s) in your head.”

 

That’s so true.  I hear my parents, teachers, and even people I don’t care for speaking in my head.

 

Who put these voices in our heads?

They get installed automatically throughout life.  Parents. Teachers. Relatives. Caregivers. Friends.  Facebook. The media…

 

The thing is, unless you are aware, you are being programmed all the time.  If you let it wash over you daily without consciousness, you are installing these voices.  The prevailing mindset of lack, poverty, and despair.

Reboot

The good news is, you can reinstall new voices.  It’s like upgrading your internal operating system to the latest, greatest version.  You choose your own voice.
Tomorrow, my son turns sixteen.  Sixteen! We’re about to start visiting colleges.  Think about focus of study. Plan out a course for life.
What I want most for him is to flip the questions.  Ask more empowering ones.
“How can I help?”
“What can I offer the world?  
What was I born to do?  
What are my gifts?

What makes me the only one?”

A Lifetime of Questions

Of course, questioning goes on for a lifetime.
We never completely know.  We are always discovering.

 

The journey of life and success IS the journey of discovering the answers to this question.  Life is self-discovery. And this question can change your life.

How can I help?

I hope this awakens something inside of you.  New voices = new life. This goes beyond parenting, music, education, business, whatever.  This is for you. And through you, you will light up the world.
“You are the light of the world.  A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and place it under a basket, but place it on a lamp-stand, and it gives light to all who are in the house.   Let your light so shine, so that they may see your good works…” – Matthew 5:14. the Bible

 

Categories
awakening growth success Wealth

What Is The Iceberg Principle Of Successful People?

People are like icebergs.  What we can see is only its tip .  There’s a whole lot going on underneath where we can’t see it.  There is a principle that successful people know.  I call it the “iceberg principle.”  

Success means a lot of different things to people.   No matter your definition of success is, though, I think we can all agree that we feel successful when we are in control of our lives, accomplishing things and feeling like we are making  a contribution to the world.  

The Iceberg Principle

Successful people use the “iceberg principle” to work on what’s underneath the surface.  

Just as icebergs can drift through oceans, melting along the way, many people drift through life until they melt into a puddle of oblivion, irrelevance and regret.   

What keeps some icebergs on a path to doom?  It’s all in the part you don’t see – steering it like a ship’s rudder.  The difference between the lost losers and successful folks  is what’s going on underneath:  their subconscious beliefs.

Subconscious Beliefs Are Controlling You

One of the most powerful subconscious beliefs people hold concerns money and wealth.

You can learn a lot about your or someone else’s iceberg – subconscious beliefs – by asking questions.  

Can you answer this question?

What is the first thing you think of when I ask , “How do you feel about money?”

Or, to put it another way, fill in the blank:  “Money is ____________________.”

Subconscious Beliefs About Money

When I was a young boy, I heard many things about money.  

  • “There’s not enough money.”
  • “Sorry, we can’t afford it.”
  • “What do you think, money grows on trees?”
  • “If we had money we could do it.”
  • “Money is the root of all evil.”

It’s no wonder that I have struggled with money and debt in my life.  

With subconscious beliefs like these, why would I ever want to be involved with  money?

Human Operating System – HOS

These controlling subconscious beliefs are like a human operating system.  Just as a smartphone has iOS  or Android, we humans have an operating system made up of beliefs.  Most of them, however, were never consciously chosen or designed by you.  You picked them up along the way.  And they are still resonating today.

Installing New Beliefs

How much more successful would I be if I grew up with beliefs like:

  • “Money is power.”
  • “Money is freedom.”
  • “Money is compassionate energy that I use to accomplish my goals.”

Skeptic’s Mind

You may think this is just mumbo-jumbo hogwash.  Woo woo New Age crap.  And, to be honest, a part of me is skeptical, too.  But, the childlike wondrous side of me says, why not?  Logically it makes sense.   The way I talk to myself definitely makes a difference.  Look at successful athletes and their powerful self-talk.   

Melt The Limiting Parts

It feels good to expose these limiting beliefs, because just exposing them is like melting these parts of my iceberg.

It’s Not Too Late

Another part of me (and maybe you?) is asking , “Well, isn’t too late?  I am what I am.”  And I get it.  It feels difficult and maybe even foreign to change your beliefs.  But let’s try a little experiment.

The Power Jacket

Over the next 30 days, think of it as if you were wearing a new jacket.  You are borrowing a power jacket.  Maybe it’s a nice blazer that makes you feel powerful, wealthy and in control.

Try saying to yourself, “I deserve to be wealthy.”   See how it feels.  Do you hear voices in your head making  negative or contrary remarks?  Interesting.

Write It Down

Take a blank piece of paper.  Draw a line down the center from top to bottom.  On the left, write the sentence “I deserve to be wealthy.”  On the right column, write whatever comes up.  It could be negative.  It could the voice of a relative.  Maybe it’s your father or mother.  Or maybe a neighbor or teacher?  

Do it at least twenty times.  Each time, write the corresponding response.  

Over time, you will notice the responses changing.  It’s very interesting!  Almost like a dialogue inside yourself.

Do it everyday until the responses change from negative to positive.  At some point, you may even “recruit” a supporter from that inner voice.

It sounds crazy and magical.  And it is.

Spending Money

Anytime you spend some money, tell yourself, “There’s plenty more where that came from.”

Holding on to money fearfully as if there were  not enough is also blocking the flow of wealth in your life.

By spending money  consciously, you add energy to the whole system and that energy  flows back to you.  We will talk more about this in a future post.

Money is just one area of your iceberg.  You can easily use the iceberg principle for health, relationships, spirituality and more.

Ancient Wisdom

These are not new ideas.  You can find them in every country  and spiritual tradition in the world.  But it seems we are a forgetful lot and easily distracted by shiny objects.  

Take some time for yourself to understand the iceberg principle.  

Carve the unseen part of your iceberg to guide you to new bluer oceans.  Send me a postcard when you land.  I’d love to know about your journey.

 

 

Categories
awakening spirit

Do you know how to hear the secret chord?

“Well I heard there was a secret chord
That David played and it pleased the Lord”

– Leonard Cohen, Hallelujah

I’ve been listening for that chord. 

It haunts me.  Just when I think I hear it, it slips away like a distant echo.  A foghorn on the black lake in the mist.

Years ago, in Thailand, I heard someone call my name.  I turned around, and there was a guy I didn’t recognize.  He was incredulous.

“Don’t you remember me?”

“No.  How do I know you?”

“We spent last summer in Taiwan together.”

“I wasn’t in Taiwan last summer.  In fact, I was only there once as a child.”

“No, dude, you were there.  It’s me Carter.”

“Carter?  Well, I don’t know how you know me but I don’t think we ever met before.”

We ended up spending days together.

We talked and talked. It was as if every question I had, he had the answer to.  And every question he had, I had the answer to.  It was like the secret chord was not a sound, but rather a conversation.

I slip in and out of periods of extreme magic. 

Unswerving faith in an invisible sun and powerful connection with a force.

And then I go all the way to the other side.

It’s like the title of a book I read long ago:  power versus force.

Sometimes I’m surfing the waves of power. 

Effortless, magical waves of abundance flow through me.

And then I get stranded on a rock.

Unable to move, marooned for what feels like eternity. 

No matter how hard I try, it seems I make little progress.

And then I remember to let it go. 

I breathe into the wind.  I let it lift me and somehow I get a little lighter.  The color of the light changes and I begin to move with flow.  The distant mountain that I so desperately sought flashes by me as I reach even higher vistas without effort.  I smile with relief.

Until I forget it all again.

Lately, I’ve been remembering again.

It all begins with internal dialog.  Is it filled with awe and gratitude?  Or has it turned to checklists and self-critiques?

I begin to practice saying it over and over.

“I love you.”
“I love you.”
“I love you.”

And a slight tingle begins.

“I love you.”
“I love you.”
“I love you.”

I try to remember this throughout the day.

It’s easiest to remember in the grey dawn light before lists and worries start to crowd the edges of my mind.

“I love you.”
“I love you.”
“I love you.”

Today I awoke at 4:34 am.

I laid in bed with my mantra.  Letting it flush through me, a golden sparkly white light coming in waves.

And out there, on the edge, somewhat distant, I think I hear it.

The secret chord.

Categories
awakening big picture

The Mindset of Successful People: 5 Secret Beliefs

mindset of success

1) Negative emotions are change signals.

When you are feeling negative emotions, it’s like a warning light on your mental dashboard for a change.  Something needs to change, whether it’s an action you are taking (or not), the environment you are in and the people you are surrounding yourself with.

2) The fog of confusion precedes the calm of clarity.

There is always a period of confusion right before the epiphany, “the a-ha moment.”  If you are feeling confused, stop, take a breath, meditate, get calm enough to see the ripples on the surface of your mental waters, and reflect.

The clouds of confusion are burned away by the sun of awareness.  A path forward is revealed.

3) You are responsible for ALL your results.

I remember when I first heard this and it was a feeling of shock.

“What do you mean I’m completely responsible for everything?”  I was so used to blaming the world for my problems.  And of course, the more you indulge in this kind of personal un-accountability, the more “proof” you get.

The traffic cop pulls only “you” over when everyone else is going at the same speed.  Or the TSA official picks only you out for a random strip search.  Of course the world is against you!  Changing your mindset is akin to magic.  By taking personal responsibility for your entire life, your health, your finances, your living environment, everything…it radically changes your world.  And at first, it’s scary.

Start in one area. Pick a specific activity where you absolutely believe that you are responsible for your results like a sport, or a musical instrument or a language.  By holding yourself accountable for your results you begin to live in this belief.  From there, you can expand to all other areas of your life.

4) Everyone is doing the best they can with what they have.

I used to have a lot of anger and frustration.  Taking on and conditioning myself with this belief has been a struggle, but produces fruit everyday.  It really is unlikely that the world is conspiring against you.  In fact, everyone is too caught up in their own problems, insecurities and limiting beliefs.  Hold your judgment and realize, they’re doing the best they can with the resources they have available at the moment.

5) There is no permanence.  Success or failure are a temporary state.

If you look around you, there’s the illusion of permanence everywhere.  The furniture in the room.  The buildings, the mountains, the lakes, trees.  But look deeper and you see that all is temporary.  A snapshot in time.  Apple is the biggest company on the planet…at the moment.  But remember US Steel, one of the largest employers in the world in the 1950’s? Today they are a mere shell of what they once were. Or what about Pan American Airlines?  These were seen as bedrock, unstoppable successes, for a while.  Nothing is permanent.

We are all in a state of motion.

Even the most solid of materials, at the quantum level, are in motion.

If we are not growing, we are dying.  Keep moving, evolving, reaching for higher and higher levels.  It’s the only way to stay in a state of success.  Don’t be misled that it’s all sunny days from now on.  There will be failures (or you can call them learnings) along the way.  But as long as you are aware of the learnings, incorporate them, and move on, you will be in a more consistent state of success.